We get the strangest things in the mail.

Some postcards we have received...


Yeah, right.


I love this company's mailings, and want this on a t-shirt. Didn't know people got so devastated about leaks unless they were...y'know. Personal. Or Liberace.

And speaking of geldings...

Win a Spanish horse? Is that like, Spanish fly, with the thinger to go with it?


This woman looks entirely too happy about being "mounted". I am alarmed...are they background checking the "lucky" winner for a history of bestiality?! Note to self: Call Society Trying to Outlaw Inappropriate Thingies During Insane Crazy Kontests (STOPITDICK).

Next, these alarming pamphlets direct to you from the L. Ron Hubbleheads, who are still trying to get to one of our employees who dropped them for basically being a giant pyramid scheme. Unless they are now trying to get to me, in which case, knock it off, Jenna Elfman - I told you I cancelled my Earthlink account!


Is there something wrong with this picture, or is it just me...?

These women holding the thing always look blissfully, blissfully happy.

Here's another one:

Is that an e-meter, or are you just happy to see me?

She looks a little too happy if you ask me.

Though if those engram dealies are designed by Pleasure Chest, I'm starting to see Scientology's appeal.* And apparently, I'm not the only one who's noticed this sketchwad female phenomenon...why don't they ever show a guy smiling while getting e-felched, huh...? Tom Cruise: this means you.

*Too bad they cost like $3000.