Just a short, uh. Burst today.

I've recently fallen into a vat of henna, and my friend remarked the roasted red color of my hair reminds him of Shirley Manson. Yipes. I mean, I'm not flattering myself. She's way hotter/shorter/angrier than me.

She must drink a lot.

Anyway, I remember reading somewhere that she wants "a man who will let me pee in his belly button".

Wha?!

Okay, I can see the potential erotic dominant/submissive b.s. and other pervvy implications of that statement. Also, it is probably a freak marketing ploy and wanton bid for attention. But still. The appeal eludes me.

It is, at the very least, extremely disrespectful to pee in one's belly button. And sloppy. Not to mention rude, crude, and totally unnecessary. And who's gonna clean that shit up...?

What would you do with a belly button full of pee anyway? Unless, that is, you live on a tarp.

Look, I don't even want to enter into it as this will no doubt become another spit vs. swallow type conundrum which somehow, I don't think Miss Manners would even dignify with a response. I think, in fact, The Belly Button Pissing Bandit should go on the list of Persons to Be Avoided.

Don't you...? No?

Perv.


Postscript: okay, so maybe I'd let Nicole Kidman pee in my belly button, but she would do no such thing. Slap. You rogue. She's a lady.