I was going to write about the horror, the horror, but I don't think you need any more of that this morning.

As astute comedian Dana Gould said in regard to New Orleans, these disaster-type scenarios are horribly bizarre. Levy breeches and gas leaks, he says, have led to sharks swimming in the streets and the water catching on fire. People dying in "shark-infested firewater" is just beyond surreal.

Likewise this report. Holy...was it not bad enough they were: (1) elderly, (2) having to evacuate, leaving their homes and everything they own, and (3) on oxygen? They have to go and die a (4) fiery death in a horrid, stinking (5) bus, caught in (6) traffic, for fuck's sake?! If that's not hell, I don't know what is.

Nobody deserves that. Nobody.

Okay, maybe Paris Hilton. That was inappropriate. But I'm not sorry, that's the way I feel.

I'm off to busy myself worrying about relatives in Texas (fortunately, those in Galveston have been evacuated, and those in Houston are in extreme hunker-down mode, thanks for asking.)

For now, I'll just continue to make light of inappropriate things, such as my hole. YES. I have a hole...some girls have three; I just have one big one, like a platypus. Unfortunately, I think it is showing. It is starting to extend down my leg. I'm just lucky I wore a long shirt today, because I think it is getting bigger by the minute. I need to be sewn up - anyone got a safety pin?!

Remind me next time an attractive co-worker comes in not to peer wonderingly under my hem and inform him, "hi! I have a huge, gaping hole-!"

Speaking of fire(d)...I'm going to hell on about five levels right now, so g'bye.

God Bless.