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Monday, July 03, 2006

MEET ZELLIE 

This is Zelda, aka The Stupid Kitty.

Zelda in her luxury cat apt. on top of the fridge, working on her next hairball creation.




She is our foreign exchange stupid kitty while her mother, who is a great friend to my kittays, is in Frahnce.

Zellie's hobbies include horking up hairballs, breaking things that have been in my family for a long time, and shitting profusely. She likes to sit on my (yucch) kitchen counter. One time, she even shit on my tumeric.

Zellie, having recently scarfed her dinner, passes gas on my kitchen counter while simultaneously knitting internal hairballs and shedding.


When kittay-mama sent her with me, she got upset saying goodbye-for-now to her kittay. Zellie just got the shits.

Zellie, atop cat post, does an interpretive dance depicting a blurry kittay, meant to represent her battle with diarrhea, and subsequent victory in the form of a solid turd.


Zellie's week-long struggle with the squirts sent her mom into a panic. In an effort to comfort her from afar, I sent the following bad camera phone images of her kittay successfully using the cat box. Well, semi-.

Please observe the 6,000 tons of gritty kitty litter her mom has so generously provided, for her to poop on.




1. Zellie pees in Box 1.











2. Zellie, for, whatever reason, finds it necessary to exit Box 1 and poop in Box 2.














3. Zellie attempts, unsuccessfully, to cover poop in Box 2 with the floor and wall.





4. There is no #4. That would be a close-up of the poop, which is too gross, even for me.

5. After some heavy-duty pooper-scoopering, I decided to give myself a facial:

Now she has the shits again. No idea why.

Despite of all this, she manages to be lovable...

...stupid Stupid Kitty.


MEET ZELLIE
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