Tuesday, December 26, 2006


Post-Xmas day in Hollywood: some drunken miscreant is wandering down the street singing, "motherfucker, ass, fuck." over and over to himself.

'Tis the season, and all that.

It is finally, FINALLY quiet, except the street sweeper just drove by at Mach 3. Fuck, those sons of bitches can move when they think no one's looking. Unless of course you are driving behind them, in which case they are slow as fucking turds in molasses.

Yeah, so I'm a little bitchy. I had no power while my neighbor's apartment, which she decorated with approx. 3,000 lights, bottle trees, etc. was lit primly, taunting me through its windows. I didn't even have any festive lights or trees or any of that bullshit; I was just trying to plug in a lamp. A lamp that had worked perfectly well the night before. A lamp that Cranky made for me out of the guts of the previous lamp he had given me, which Beeker broke in 5 seconds flat, immediately after it was taken out of the box.

This is all Cranky's fault, because the lamp he gave me, which I didn't like in the first place, was rewired to form a second lamp, which is also questionable (cords run through a mike stand marked "Beakerproof"); he was not here for Xmas, and it zotzed out all the lights in my whole apt. except for the kitchen. Like I was going to use that.

Suffice to say I spent most of Christmas Day calling DWP, running up and downstairs, throwing switches to see which circuit I'd broken, only to discover my antique fusebox had blown all but one of its even antiquier fuses. And that no one open on Xmas Day carried them. So I bought frozen pizza and some extension cords at Walgreen's.

The only thing more depressing than that was the fact that about two spillion others had the same idea. That place was packed. Which makes null and void my thinking that anyone with half a brain (self included?) or a dollar (self excluded) would get the hell out of L.A. for Christmas, if they could. I did not understand why there should still be traffic (!) here on Christmas Day. Not to mention the fucking conjunto music being blasted from apartments everywhere.

Oh, for the love of fuck. Doesn't anyone care about Faith, Hope, Love, and !@#$% peace and QUIET around here...?! "Silent Night," my a**.

This is what I think of the holiday this year.


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